Here are 100 books that Monsters in Love fans have personally recommended if you like
Monsters in Love.
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I’ve spent a lot of my career teaching people to navigate the complex, often messy intersection of ethics, communication, and human behavior. As a behavior analyst, teacher, supervisor, and coauthor of Daily Ethics: Creating Intentional Practice for Behavior Analysts, I’ve seen firsthand how the ability to have honest, compassionate, and courageous conversations can make or break relationships, teams, and outcomes. I chose these five books because they’ve shaped how I show up in my work and life—and because I have seen their contents help others become more intentional, committed, and successful communicators.
I recommend this book because it taught me that every hard conversation has three layers: what happened, what’s felt, and what that means to each person.
Before reading it, I often got stuck on the “facts” and missed the emotional undercurrent, especially for my communication partner.
Now, I approach challenging discussions with a mental checklist from Difficult Conversations that helps me listen for what’s beneath the words. It has saved me from countless misunderstandings and made me a much better listener and collaborator.
The 10th-anniversary edition of the New York Times business bestseller-now updated with "Answers to Ten Questions People Ask"
We attempt or avoid difficult conversations every day-whether dealing with an underperforming employee, disagreeing with a spouse, or negotiating with a client. From the Harvard Negotiation Project, the organization that brought you Getting to Yes, Difficult Conversations provides a step-by-step approach to having those tough conversations with less stress and more success. you'll learn how to:
· Decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation · Start a conversation without defensiveness · Listen for the meaning of what is not said ·…
Traumatization and Its Aftermath
by
Antonieta Contreras,
A fresh take on the difference between trauma and hardship in order to help accurately spot the difference and avoid over-generalizations.
The book integrates the latest findings in brain science, child development, psycho-social context, theory, and clinical experiences to make the case that trauma is much more than a cluster…
Being born during the apartheid era in South Africa motivated me to study law and pursue justice, so I completed a 6-year university degree (BA LLB). However, when I finally arrived in the law courts, I realized this was just not me. I foresaw a life of mind, having to be smart and clever, when in fact I wanted a life of hands and heart. I then trained in therapeutic massage, and in my early 30’s, I began exploring sex – relaxing, being more present, trusting my body. This innocent curiosity totally turned my life around – I’ve written 8 books and thousands of couples have participated in my Making Love Retreats.
This book has been a blessing for my life and my relationships.
I learned how to express my needs without blame or demand, and how to listen so that others feel both heard and understood. What also amazed me was to realize how limited my vocabulary was. I was basically using generic words like nice or good or great or fine, without actually giving any color or content of my experience in that present moment. I also noticed the tendency to say “I feel” a certain thing when, in fact, I was thinking a certain thing. Not feeling at all.
Rosenberg brings a clarity to language which encouraged me to expand my vocabulary and choose words with more content. And, most importantly, to communicate in a gentle, clear, non-blaming or violating way.
5,000,000 COPIES SOLD WORLDWIDE • TRANSLATED IN MORE THAN 35 LANGUAGES
What is Violent Communication?
If “violent” means acting in ways that result in hurt or harm, then much of how we communicate—judging others, bullying, having racial bias, blaming, finger pointing, discriminating, speaking without listening, criticizing others or ourselves, name-calling, reacting when angry, using political rhetoric, being defensive or judging who’s “good/bad” or what’s “right/wrong” with people—could indeed be called “violent communication.”
What is Nonviolent Communication?
Nonviolent Communication is the integration of four things:
• Consciousness: a set of principles that support living a life of compassion, collaboration, courage, and…
As a human, I struggle with staying connected during conflict. Because conflict naturally shows up in all relationships, I had to figure out how to do it better, or die alone! My path has woven through studying conflict resolution, becoming a relationship therapist, doing deep learning within my own life partnership, and exploring the realm of somatic psychology in my doctoral work. I long for a world where we have the skills we need to work through conflict without resorting to violence. In my dreams, the world is able to coexist with love and conflict. Our relationships thrive when we speak our full truth, and embody our values in action.
My mantra used to be, "Being in relationship is hard!" I thought that having a healthy relationship meant non-stop effort. What I didn't realize is that relationships become easier when you have the right skills.
David Richo breaks down the necessary skills for effective relating in a way that honors your past, your humanity, and your compassion. Finding this book was like finding a key that unlocked happiness in my personal and business relationships. With thoughtful explanations and practical skill building, this is a must-read for those who are done suffering with painful relationship patterns.
This beloved book has touched hundreds of thousands of lives with its profound and actionable advice. Retaining the core message of becoming more mindful in our relationships, this edition includes new and revised material that addresses how we live and love today. A new preface touches on David Richo’s experience with the book over time and outlines the key updates, including attention to online dating and modern communication styles as well as new perspectives on anger and ending relationships.
“Most people think of love as a feeling,” says Richo, “but love is not so much a feeling as a way…
Traumatization and Its Aftermath
by
Antonieta Contreras,
A fresh take on the difference between trauma and hardship in order to help accurately spot the difference and avoid over-generalizations.
The book integrates the latest findings in brain science, child development, psycho-social context, theory, and clinical experiences to make the case that trauma is much more than a cluster…
As a human, I struggle with staying connected during conflict. Because conflict naturally shows up in all relationships, I had to figure out how to do it better, or die alone! My path has woven through studying conflict resolution, becoming a relationship therapist, doing deep learning within my own life partnership, and exploring the realm of somatic psychology in my doctoral work. I long for a world where we have the skills we need to work through conflict without resorting to violence. In my dreams, the world is able to coexist with love and conflict. Our relationships thrive when we speak our full truth, and embody our values in action.
I grew up in the midwest, where conflict is to be avoided at all costs.
Reading this book helped me understand that conflict is really about our deepest longings, and our fears that they will not be met. Through developing tolerance for being in direct conflict and skills to work through it, conflict becomes a friend instead of an enemy.
The Crossroads of Conflict: A Journey into the Heart of Dispute Resolution (Second Edition) describes all conflicts as “crossroads” and catalysts for learning, evolution, growth, and wisdom. It shows how to locate the root sources of conflict and remove the barriers to forgiveness and reconciliation, collaboration, and community.
Ken Cloke’s analysis of the inner sources of chronic conflict and ideas for a unified theory for resolving conflict is groundbreaking and destined to become a cornerstone of the future of dispute resolution.
What makes some people, communities and countries happier and healthier than others? I’m a personal growth author, speaker, and therapist with an A.B. in Biology from Harvard, M.D. from UCSD, and M.Phil. from Cambridge. For the past 12 years of calling myself a Happiness Engineer, I’ve traveled to 30+ countries and read 150 books a year to answer that question. The result: “The 5 Pillars of Human Thriving”, the irreducible requirements for health and happiness, namely Robust Relationships, Meaningful Work, Sound Sleep, Mental Fitness, and Physical Fitness. These books, drawn from a pool of thousands, represent the best works I’ve found for each Pillar. May you find them transformational!
This is the best book I’ve ever read on forging, deepening, and maintaining exceptional relationships. The authors are the long-time instructors of the infamous Interpersonal Dynamics course (aka “Touchy-Feely”) at the Stanford Graduate School of Business. They’ve been teaching it for 50+ years combined, so they know what they’re talking about. I love that they define an “exceptional relationship” as one where “you feel seen, known, and appreciated for who you really are, not an edited version of yourself.” Who wouldn’t want more of those?
I particularly like the set of tools the authors offer for handling conflict, creating a safe space for vulnerability, and giving feedback. I appreciate their simple (and challenging) step-by-step plan towards attaining pure relationship gold that's both deeply insightful and transformative.
Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds features exciting fiction and non-fiction decodable readers to enthuse and inspire children. They are fully aligned to Letters and Sounds Phases 1-6 and contain notes in the back. The Handbooks provide support in demonstration and modelling, monitoring comprehension and expanding vocabulary.
Join a man, his son and his dog as they go to the local allotment to plant new seeds and plants, in this non-fiction book.
Chant and Chatter books are written especially for the Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds series at Book Band Pink. The narratives and non-fiction texts…
Joanna Faber is the daughter of Adele Faber, a pioneer of the internationally acclaimed best-selling How To Talk series that has helped millions of parents worldwide. Joanna joined forces with her childhood friend Julie King to provide support for parents and educators of the 21st century. Each draws on her own experiences – Joanna as a bilingual teacher in West Harlem, Julie as a specialist in helping parents of children on the autism spectrum – to lead workshops and speak to parent groups, teachers, doctors, and librarians worldwide, including online sessions to support parents during Covid lockdowns and afterwards. Together, Joanna and Julie have written two best-selling How To Talk books.
Having children can put stress on a relationship. You COULD make an appointment to see a couples' therapist. Or, you could read Michelle Brody's insightful book.
Her explanations and whimsical diagrams, illustrating how conflicts between couples can escalate, will leave you chuckling with recognition and give you the tools to resolve your differences peacefully.
This Illustrated Guide for Couples Ends 12 Hurtful Arguments Once and for All!
Conflict within relationships is complex and challenging to overcome. In her 20 years of working with couples, clinical psychologist Michelle Brody found a way to make change simpler. Her secret: clear and lighthearted illustrations that help couples literally see what’s driving their battles and blocking their bond, so they can chart a course together to stop the fights.
The Money Fight “You’re such a cheapskate!” “You spend way too much!”
The Sex Fight “Not tonight. I’m not in the mood.” “You haven’t been in the mood since…
For 30 years, my books, articles, and talks have warned the U.S. failure/refusal to work with Russia and the Europeans to forge a new system of global security after the Cold War could provoke a Russian nationalist backlash, a war between Moscow and Kyiv, and possibly major power conflict. My bookWorld War Trump warned that Trump could stage a coup. Toward an Alternative Transatlantic Strategy warned Biden’s support for Ukraine would provoke conflict with Russia. I have also written poems and novels on IR theory, plus two novels based on my experiences in China during the tumultuous years of 1988-89 and in France during the COVID-19 pandemic.
This is a unique book that, based on Greek tragedy, develops a deeper, philosophical understanding of the Ukraine-Russia conflict, with an eye toward conflict resolution.
In closely examining that conflict, with Russian language sources, and from a historical and rare socio-cultural-linguistic perspective, Petro’s book shows how an essentially local/regional dispute over the Donbas region in eastern Ukraine has helped to generate a horrific conflict.
Given the fact that most books on the “second” Cold War examine the conflict from an international perspective, this book shows how a “local” dispute has blossomed into a “globalizing” conflict.
The conflict in Ukraine has deep domestic roots. A third of the population, primarily in the East and South, regards its own Russian cultural identity as entirely compatible with a Ukrainian civic identity. The state's reluctance to recognize this ethnos as a legitimate part of the modern Ukrainian nation, has created a tragic cycle that entangles Ukrainian politics.
The Tragedy of Ukraine argues that in order to untangle the conflict within the Ukraine, it must be addressed on an emotional, as well as institutional level. It draws on Richard Ned Lebow's 'tragic vision of politics' and on classical Greek tragedy…
I’m a serial adventurer and entrepreneur who loves to read, teach, and encounter our world in as many different ways as I can. I am an innately curious programmer and a goal-oriented completionist at heart. I’ve cruised around America’s Great Loop, run a marathon, written more than fifteen books, and been involved with many small businesses. I also love to work with new programming languages. I was around for the early days of the Java, Ruby, and Elixir programming languages. I built teams to build products using each one of them. My passion is to help programmers break through their blockers with fresh insights.
Adoption and change often lead to the kind of conflict that regularly breaks people.
I find that creators are often equipped to deal with technical creation, but are rarely equipped to deal with conflict. In this book, Amanda Ripley walks through how several skilled professionals found themselves in conflict.
Then she walks through how those conflicts started, who the players are, how they interact, how to engage in healthy conflict, and eventually how to get back out again.
Many of my peers in open-source technology, especially creators of languages and frameworks, find themselves in conflict and don’t have the tools to deal with it.
This book helped me think of conflict in a systematic way, and how to plot a course back out again.
When we are baffled by the insanity of the "other side"-in our politics, at work, or at home-it's because we aren't seeing how the conflict itself has taken over.
That's what "high conflict" does. It's the invisible hand of our time. And it's different from the useful friction of healthy conflict. That's good conflict, and it's a necessary force that pushes us to be better people.
High conflict, by contrast, is what happens when discord distills into a good-versus-evil kind of feud, the kind with an us and a them. In this state, the normal rules of engagement no longer…
I was raised a Quaker in England in the years after the Second World War. Quakers don’t have creeds, but they have strong beliefs about such things as the immorality of war. In the 1950s there was also huge prejudice, particularly against homosexuality which was then illegal. Issues like these gnawed at me throughout my 55-year career as a philosophy professor. Now 82 and finally retired, I'm turning against the problems of war and prejudice, applying much that I've learnt in my career as a philosopher interested in evolutionary theory, most particularly Charles Darwin. For this reason, intentionally, Why We Hate:Understanding the Roots of Human Conflictis aimed at the general reader.
Douglas Fry is a paleoanthropologist who shows unambiguously that war is a modern human invention. Before the advent of agriculture there was no war. There was often violence – bumping off a resource-draining grandmother – but no systematic fighting and killing. With agriculture came an exploding population, nowhere to flee and hide, and fixed assets that you just couldn’t pick up and leave. But as starting war is a function of culture, so ending war is a function of culture. The United Nations is not perfect, but it has been hugely important in reducing conflict.
A profoundly heartening view of human nature, Beyond War offers a hopeful prognosis for a future without war. Douglas P. Fry convincingly argues that our ancient ancestors were not innately warlike-and neither are we. He points out that, for perhaps ninety-nine percent of our history, for well over a million years, humans lived in nomadic hunter-and-gatherer groups, egalitarian bands where warfare was a rarity. Drawing on archaeology and fascinating recent fieldwork on hunter-gatherer bands from around the world, Fry debunks the idea that war is ancient and inevitable. For instance, among Aboriginal Australians, warfare was an extreme anomaly. Fry also…
I am a work in progress, on my way to becoming a conscious communicator and an even better human being. I believe that intentional communication and (the) quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives, careers, and societies. I’ve spent decades guiding people and cultures to foster open communication, cultivate self-understanding, and deepen trust, from large Fortune 500 to small businesses. Building communication skills is a practice that leads to self-transformation and finding meaning, and happiness. Each of these books will help you to better understand yourself and others, and learn to communicate at the level of trust.
A practical guide to understanding yourself, understanding others, and how to improve workplace relationships through better communication.
If you’ve been in the workplace for any length of time, you know that collaboration is a must for career success and that there’s usually at least one challenging person that can destroy trust and tank your productivity. In this book, you’ll learn strategies for identifying the eight types of difficult co-workers and gain insights into their motivations.
She also provides actionable advice for how to step into these difficult conversations, so you can build better relationships.
Named one of "22 new books...that you should consider reading before the year is out" by Fortune
"This practical and empathetic guide to taking the high road is worth a look for workers lost in conflict." - Publisher's Weekly
A research-based, practical guide for how to handle difficult people at work.
Work relationships can be hard. The stress of dealing with difficult people dampens our creativity and productivity, degrades our ability to think clearly and make sound decisions, and causes us to disengage. We might lie awake at night worrying, withdraw from work, or react in ways we later regret-rolling…
