Here are 100 books that When It's Never About You fans have personally recommended if you like
When It's Never About You.
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I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, deeply committed to healing intergenerational trauma and fostering healthy relationships. My passion for this field stems from witnessing the transformational power of understanding and addressing the roots of personal and relational issues. Having navigated the complex dynamics of family systems both professionally and personally, I've seen firsthand how unearthing and healing old wounds can lead to profound growth and stronger bonds. This fuels my dedication to guiding others on their journeys toward self-discovery and improved mental health. The books I recommend are ones that have not only enriched my professional practice but have also offered me invaluable insights into the psychology of human connections.
This is a groundbreaking book that reshaped my understanding of family trauma and its impact across generations. It introduced me to the concept of inherited family trauma and offered insightful methods to uncover and break these cycles. This book not only educated me but also provided a path toward healing and self-discovery.
Reading it was an educational experience, revealing how much of who we are is influenced by the stories of our ancestors. Wolynn’s compassionate approach made complex psychological theories accessible and applicable to my life. I highly recommend it to anyone interested in exploring their family history and healing from its unseen effects.
Inherited family trauma is currently an area of growing interest, as science increasingly explores what we know intuitively: that the effects of trauma can pass from one generation to the next, and that the answers to some of our greatest life problems often lie not within our own story, but in the experiences of our parents, grandparents, great-grandparents and extended family. Here, pioneer Mark Wolyn shows readers how they can overcome inherited trauma and reclaim their lives.
The Victorian mansion, Evenmere, is the mechanism that runs the universe.
The lamps must be lit, or the stars die. The clocks must be wound, or Time ceases. The Balance between Order and Chaos must be preserved, or Existence crumbles.
Appointed the Steward of Evenmere, Carter Anderson must learn the…
I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, deeply committed to healing intergenerational trauma and fostering healthy relationships. My passion for this field stems from witnessing the transformational power of understanding and addressing the roots of personal and relational issues. Having navigated the complex dynamics of family systems both professionally and personally, I've seen firsthand how unearthing and healing old wounds can lead to profound growth and stronger bonds. This fuels my dedication to guiding others on their journeys toward self-discovery and improved mental health. The books I recommend are ones that have not only enriched my professional practice but have also offered me invaluable insights into the psychology of human connections.
It revolutionized the way I view apologies and relationships. This book opened my eyes to the power of a sincere apology and how it can mend even the deepest of rifts.
Lerner’s insights into why people struggle to apologize genuinely were enlightening, offering me clarity on past conflicts and how to approach them differently. It didn’t just make me reevaluate my actions but also brought a sense of healing and closure to lingering issues. The book helped me improve my relationships and understand the complex dynamics of apologies and forgiveness.
It's concise, impactful, and truly transformative.
Renowned psychologist and bestselling author of The Dance of Anger sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language, "I'm sorry," and offers a unique perspective on the challenge of healing broken relationships and restoring trust. Dr. Harriet Lerner has been studying apologies for more than two decades, namely, why some people won't give them. Now she offers compelling stories and solid theory that demonstrates the transformative power of making amends and what is required for healing when the damage we've inflicted (or received) is far from simple. Readers will learn how to craft a meaningful…
I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, deeply committed to healing intergenerational trauma and fostering healthy relationships. My passion for this field stems from witnessing the transformational power of understanding and addressing the roots of personal and relational issues. Having navigated the complex dynamics of family systems both professionally and personally, I've seen firsthand how unearthing and healing old wounds can lead to profound growth and stronger bonds. This fuels my dedication to guiding others on their journeys toward self-discovery and improved mental health. The books I recommend are ones that have not only enriched my professional practice but have also offered me invaluable insights into the psychology of human connections.
This was a perspective changer for me. This book not only taught me practical ways to manage anxiety but also transformed my outlook on life’s challenges, truly opening my mind with its insights.
It guided me through addressing unresolved issues without overwhelming sadness or fear, instead fostering a sense of empowerment. The light-hearted tone and moments of humor made me laugh and brought unexpected joy, making the exploration of personal growth enjoyable rather than daunting.
Smith's approachable style makes complex psychological concepts accessible. It helped me to find a calm in the chaos of my daily life.
Licensed therapist and respected mental health writer Dr. Kathleen Smith offers a smart, practical antidote to our anxiety-ridden times. Everything Isn't Terrible is an informative, and fun guide - featuring a healthy dose of humour - for people who want to become beacons of calmness in our anxious world.
Like Sarah Knight's "No F*cks Given" guides and You Are a Badass, Everything Isn't Terrible will inspire readers to confront their anxious selves, take charge of their anxiety, and increase their own capacity to choose how they respond to it. Comprised of short chapters containing anecdotal examples from Smith's personal experience…
Magical realism meets the magic of Christmas in this mix of Jewish, New Testament, and Santa stories–all reenacted in an urban psychiatric hospital!
On locked ward 5C4, Josh, a patient with many similarities to Jesus, is hospitalized concurrently with Nick, a patient with many similarities to Santa. The two argue…
I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, deeply committed to healing intergenerational trauma and fostering healthy relationships. My passion for this field stems from witnessing the transformational power of understanding and addressing the roots of personal and relational issues. Having navigated the complex dynamics of family systems both professionally and personally, I've seen firsthand how unearthing and healing old wounds can lead to profound growth and stronger bonds. This fuels my dedication to guiding others on their journeys toward self-discovery and improved mental health. The books I recommend are ones that have not only enriched my professional practice but have also offered me invaluable insights into the psychology of human connections.
It’s Within You was a life-changing read that fundamentally changed my perspective on personal growth and resilience. It taught me powerful lessons about the strength and potential that lie within us all, which helps us know our sense of worth.
The book provided me with the tools to confront and heal from past traumas, offering a sense of peace I hadn't felt before. While it didn’t make me laugh, it did evoke a profound sense of joy and empowerment, steering my emotions toward hope rather than fear.
A Powerful Synthesis of Modern Psychology and Ancient Spiritual Wisdom
What if you could just stop worrying about what others think of you?
How much more could you accomplish in life?
ONE simple shift could make it happen...
Burned out. Struggling. Undervalued. Conflicted. Invalidated. Anxious. Angry. Empty. All signs that your self-worth isn't coming from within. We've all been there, and it's not a place where healthy relationships, personal freedom, and peace of mind can thrive.
Do you find yourself asking:
Why doesn't he ever change?... Why don't they recognize my value?... Why won't she ever give me a break?...…
My 30+ years as a psychotherapist and mental health educator with a strong focus on codependency has enabled me to create, produce and provide compelling and life-changing books and seminars. My own experiences recovering from codependency led to the creation of my ground-breaking Human Magnet Syndrome, Self-Love Recovery Treatment, and Codependency Cure contributions. It is understood through my work that codependency is a mere symptom of not loving oneself. Codependency is not what needs to be treated, rather the root cause needs to be addressed. Therefore, I have re-defined and re-conceptualized codependency into “Self-Love Deficit Disorder™ (SLDD)," which is a trauma, core shame, pathological loneliness, and addiction disorder.
This book, written by my friend and fellow psychotherapist Robert Jackman, helps readers explore unresolved wounds from their childhood. Robert describes his own past, and his journey to assist readers with developing a deeper understanding of their relationships and codependency patterns. As many people are not aware of the unresolved emotional pain that they may carry, this book is a very valuable resource as it explains why childhood trauma may be the root cause of their feelings of depression, anxiety, and other negative emotions. A truly valuable book written by Robert’s own experience healing his lost inner child.
As you discovered through reading Healing Your Lost Inner Child, until we do our work to examine, understand and heal our wounded inner child, this part will continue to show up in our lives. In Healing Your Lost Inner Child Companion Workbook, Psychotherapist and author Robert Jackman builds on the extensive material in the book with expanded exercises to help you better understand your inner child, yourself and your wisdom so that you feel authentic and complete.
This workbook features additional stories, examples and new concepts. You can read the Companion Workbook independently, but you will receive a deeper level…
My 30+ years as a psychotherapist and mental health educator with a strong focus on codependency has enabled me to create, produce and provide compelling and life-changing books and seminars. My own experiences recovering from codependency led to the creation of my ground-breaking Human Magnet Syndrome, Self-Love Recovery Treatment, and Codependency Cure contributions. It is understood through my work that codependency is a mere symptom of not loving oneself. Codependency is not what needs to be treated, rather the root cause needs to be addressed. Therefore, I have re-defined and re-conceptualized codependency into “Self-Love Deficit Disorder™ (SLDD)," which is a trauma, core shame, pathological loneliness, and addiction disorder.
This book, written by fellow psychotherapist Terri Cole, is a valuable resource for those struggling to set boundaries in their relationships. Whether it be a romantic partner, friend, or colleague, Terri delivers very practical information that will help the reader develop skills to stop abandoning yourself for the sake of others. This book will help the reader understand why they feel powerless to set boundaries—while helping them gain the strength and confidence to do so. As a psychotherapist specializing in codependency, although aimed towards women, this book is an effective resource for anyone who struggles with setting boundaries.
Psychotherapist Terri Cole teaches a simple but powerful truth: without healthy boundaries, you can't live an authentic and fulfilled life. After all, if you're always smiling and saying "yes" to everything, how is anyone else supposed to know you're burnt out, overloaded, and not up to taking on yet another task?
This is especially true for today's women, who are often caught between cultural conditioning toward being "nice" and the need to protect their own well-being. With that in mind, Cole presents Boundary Boss, a comprehensive guide for any woman who wants to master creating and maintaining healthy boundaries.
A Duke with rigid opinions, a Lady whose beliefs conflict with his, a long disputed parcel of land, a conniving neighbour, a desperate collaboration, a failure of trust, a love found despite it all.
Alexander Cavendish, Duke of Ravensworth, returned from war to find that his father and brother had…
As the co-author of Broken But Healing, I know firsthand what it means to survive emotional, physical, and psychological trauma—and to slowly piece yourself back together. Books were a lifeline during my healing journey. They offered comfort, clarity, and the reminder that I wasn’t alone. These five books helped shape my own recovery and inspired me to share my story so others could find the strength to rebuild, too.
This classic explores the deep emotional wounds created by shame—often carried silently by men who were taught to be tough or stoic.
Bradshaw explains how toxic shame forms in childhood and adulthood, shaping relationships, self-worth, and emotional patterns. The book offers clarity, compassion, and practical steps for breaking generational cycles and learning to reconnect with your true self.
Readers who feel “not enough,” emotionally guarded, or disconnected often find relief and understanding in Bradshaw’s approach. It’s a powerful resource for anyone seeking emotional freedom and personal growth.
"I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw, "to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed."
Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.
Key Features
This is not just a recovery book. Among other things, it…
I have a passion for helping people move past the pain of divorce because I’ve been there myself. As a counselor I knew what I needed to do to cope and heal but I also quickly realized the importance of making prayerful decisions and trusting God. It’s my joy to walk you through steps you can take to cope now and move to a brighter future. My education, career, faith, and experiences have resulted in my book Peace after Divorce being recognized as an exemplary Christian self-help book by the Illumination Book Awards.
I often see people who believe they need someone else to make them whole. This is especially true when someone has been emotionally or spiritually abused. Emotional abuse is when someone consistently belittles and dominates you dismissing your value and making you feel less than. In addition to addressing emotional abuse, Don’t Call it Love also delves into the issues of spiritual abuse, something I have seen all too often in my ministry. It’s a travesty when your mate distorts scripture to manipulate and control you or to make you feel less than. If you have experienced emotional or spiritual abuse this book can help you understand your true value in the eyes of God and give you insight into how to avoid continuing to land in abusive relationships.
"You complete me" may be a romantic line in a popular movie, but it's not a healthy basis for a real relationship. Unfortunately, many people are drawn into relationships that are unfulfilling precisely because they are looking to other people to fill in the places where they are lacking--they are looking for a person who will "complete" them. At the heart of relationship dependency is a person's belief that he or she alone is not enough. But using others to provide wholeness simply does not work, because while we are made to be relationship dependent, it is God we must…
My 30+ years as a psychotherapist and mental health educator with a strong focus on codependency has enabled me to create, produce and provide compelling and life-changing books and seminars. My own experiences recovering from codependency led to the creation of my ground-breaking Human Magnet Syndrome, Self-Love Recovery Treatment, and Codependency Cure contributions. It is understood through my work that codependency is a mere symptom of not loving oneself. Codependency is not what needs to be treated, rather the root cause needs to be addressed. Therefore, I have re-defined and re-conceptualized codependency into “Self-Love Deficit Disorder™ (SLDD)," which is a trauma, core shame, pathological loneliness, and addiction disorder.
This is Robert Jackman’s second book, which explains why unresolved inner child wounding contributes to codependency patterns in relationships. This book helps the reader develop a deeper understanding of codependency, which, as a result, helps them identify the unresolved trauma that contributes to it. This book is a useful resource to help the reader answer questions as to why they feel their relationship has gone off-track, and why they may struggle with communication. This book is recommended to those who are currently in a relationship or want to avoid falling into the same pattern in their next relationship.
Many people struggle at times with a challenging relationship or marriage and ask themselves how things got so screwed up. They wonder what they're doing wrong and why they keep making bad choices in who they date or partner with. Trying to fix these problems using outdated communication tools rarely works, so many give up, feeling lost, defeated and resentful.
This book helps you see how your unresolved inner child wounding keeps showing up, attracting and meshing with another’s codependent parts in a wounded dance—like a moth to a flame. Once you read this book, you will begin to see…
It is April 1st, 2038. Day 60 of China's blockade of the rebel island of Taiwan.
The US government has agreed to provide Taiwan with a weapons system so advanced that it can disrupt the balance of power in the region. But what pilot would be crazy enough to run…
Throughout my life as a therapist, I have focused on couple and family relationships, including the relationship we have with ourselves. When trauma was beginning to be recognised as something most people can and do experience, when we began to realise that it isn’t just front-line combat soldiers who get traumatised, I began my journey into how trauma affects our relationships. My study of trauma and relationships has helped my work with clients and, without naming their experiences as trauma, has moved them on from re-enacting the damage caused to them or unknowingly inflicting the same on others.
Having grown up with an extremely toxic parent, I felt, and still feel, the fallout. The trauma of being silently ignored for days even when in dire need or having to care for an alcoholic parent – and worse still - from a very young age, I got used to having to fend for myself.
Toxic Parents explained it all to me: how this treatment leaves deep scars that are difficult to heal, yet that there is hope for reparation. It took me on a journey of understanding, gave me skills to stand up when I felt I was falling down, and led me further into my curiosity of how to become an effective therapist.
This is another book on my list for clients to read, that helped them to open up during sessions about their own experiences and giving way for healing to stand a chance.
__________________________________________________________________ Bestselling author and psychologist Dr Susan Forward offers effective alternatives for achieving inner peace and freeing yourself from frustrating patterns of relationships with your parents.
Millions of lives are damaged by the legacy of parental abuse: * Parents who ignored their children's needs or overburdened them with guilt. * Parents who were alcoholic or addicted to drugs. * Parents who were exploitative and cruel, or simply indifferent and inadequate.
When these children reach adulthood the damage done by their toxic parents manifests itself in depression, or difficulties with relationships, careers and decision-making. In Toxic Parents, Dr Susan Forward shows…
