Here are 100 books that The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control fans have personally recommended if you like
The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control.
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I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
I first learned about Logan Ury listening to the podcast This is Dating. While I was waiting on the second season to drop, I learned about Dr. Ury’s book.
I’m not trying to be ageist, but it was refreshing to hear dating advice from a professional that isn’t older and hasn’t been married for decades. Ury’s dating years being more recent meant she gets the landscape modern daters are struggling to find love in. Her perspective was instantly more relevant to me.
There were also several knowledge gems that she dropped throughout her book that I’d already learned the hard way, which gave me more confidence in giving the new-to-me information she presented a shot.
'A definitive guide for a generation navigating the murky waters of modern love' Esther Perel
A funny and practical guide to help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.
Have you ever looked around and wondered, "Why has everyone found love except me?" You're not the only one. Great relationships don't just appear in our lives - they're the culmination of a series of decisions, including who to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions,…
Magical realism meets the magic of Christmas in this mix of Jewish, New Testament, and Santa stories–all reenacted in an urban psychiatric hospital!
On locked ward 5C4, Josh, a patient with many similarities to Jesus, is hospitalized concurrently with Nick, a patient with many similarities to Santa. The two argue…
I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
I read this book in grad school while I was working on an essay for the Los Angeles Review of Books about choosing to be child-free.
Sometimes, you just need some real talk and a reminder that the deck really is stacked against you when it comes to dating.This book helped provide some much-needed perspective so that I could understand that there’s only so much control I have over my own singleness and that there are cultural factors at play.
If you’re single and searching, there’s no end to other people’s explanations, excuses, and criticism explaining why you haven’t found a partner:
“You’re too picky. Just find a good-enough guy and you’ll be fine.” “You’re too desperate. If men think you need them, they’ll run scared.” “You’re too independent. Smart, ambitious women always have a harder time finding mates.” “You have low self-esteem. You can’t love someone else until you’ve learned to love yourself.” “You’re too needy. You can’t be happy in a relationship until you’ve learned to be happy on your own.”
I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
A lot of people know Rachel Cargle because of her activism and her community building. But her life story shows how sometimes you have to let go of what you’ve been taught to want so you’re free to go after what you really want.
Rachel wasn’t satisfied being a well-loved, stay-at-home wife in a small Ohio town. But it was hard for her to exit her marriage because we’ve all been taught to find a good man and hang on tight. Rachel did manage to leave and step onto a radically different life path. She’s open in the book about fluidity around her sexuality and exploring non-monogamy.
What would life be like if we had the courage to say, 'I want something different'?
'Elegant, thoughtful, vulnerable, and inspiring' Elizabeth Gilbert
From a highly lauded modern voice in feminism and racial justice comes a deeply personal and insightful testament to the power of reimagining - the act of creating in our mind's eye that which does not but can and should exist
We all experience breaking points, those moments when we realise that something must change. For activist, philanthropist, and CEO Rachel E. Cargle, reimagining - relationships, work, education, rest, faith and power - saw her through some…
Stealing technology from parallel Earths was supposed to make Declan rich. Instead, it might destroy everything.
Declan is a self-proclaimed interdimensional interloper, travelling to parallel Earths to retrieve futuristic cutting-edge technology for his employer. It's profitable work, and he doesn't ask questions. But when he befriends an amazing humanoid robot,…
I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
I contributed an essay to this collection and there’s quite a few writers I admire in this book, as well.
It’s refreshing to see other people’s perspective on what can feel like an albatross around your neck. Some of the essays are humorous, others are more poignant, but they all work together to show that a single life can look and feel a bazillion different ways—yours will be what you make it.
A feminist anthology inspired by legendary Cosmopolitan editor Helen Gurley Brown's Sex and the Single Girl, featuring twenty-four new essays on the triumphs and heartbreaks of modern singlehood from acclaimed and bestselling authors, including Kristen Arnett, Morgan Parker, Evette Dionne, and Melissa Febos.
Sixty years ago, Helen Gurley Brown's Sex and the Single Girl sent shockwaves through the United States, selling more than two million copies in three weeks. Helen's message was radical for its time: marriage wasn't essential for women to lead rich, fulfilling lives.
As a police psychologist and mystery writer—I call myself a shrink with ink—I love to read how other authors portray therapists in their novels.It’s challenging to bring tension, action, and conflict to a 50-minute session that primarily involves quiet conversation, perhaps salted with tears. I started out writing non-fiction. Then I got tired of reality and began writing mysteries inspired by real police officers and their families. Writing fiction was harder, but more fun. Sometimes it’s been therapeutic. I especially enjoy the opportunity to take potshots at cops who treated me poorly, incompetent psychologists, and two of my ex-husbands.
I love books with sardonic humor, especially those that poke fun at psychologists and other mental health professionals. I do it in my own novels.
Most clinicians are earnest, compassionate, and ethical. But like every other profession, we have some bad apples who give psychology a bad name and deserve all the jokes and cartoons and late-night comedy sketches we get.
Shapiro’s book is about a neurotic writer with a weight problem who searches for a new therapist after her long-time clinician leaves town. Applying speed dating to her protagonist’s search for a shrink was the perfect vehicle for taking jabs at my profession.
I laughed more than I cringed. It was, for me, an opportunity to look at myself and my colleagues from the client’s point of view.
“Proust had a cookie. Susan Shapiro has a cupcake—and a really hilarious book.”
—Patricia Marx, author of Him, Her, Him Again, the End of Him
In Susan Shapiro’s laugh-out-loud funny fictional debut Speed Shrinking, Manhattan self-help author Julia Goodman thinks she’s got her addictive personality under control. Then her beloved psychoanalyst moves away at the same time her husband takes off to L.A. and her best friend gets married and moves to Ohio.
Feeling lonely and left out, Julia fills in the void with food, becomes a cupcake addict, and blimps out. This is a huge problem—especially since she’s about…
I’m an intuitive channel and spiritual guide, deeply passionate about personal transformation. Over the years, I’ve worked with countless individuals to help them break through limiting beliefs, tap into their true potential, and live more empowered lives. My own journey of self-discovery has led me to explore topics like spirituality, psychology, self-concept, and energy work—areas that are all interconnected in creating lasting change. As a coach, content creator, and author of Show Up As Her, I’ve gained valuable insights that continue to shape my growth. These books have each had a profound impact on my journey, and I’m excited to share them with you.
This book helped me understand the deep connection between our past experiences and our present behavior. I love how Dr. Nicole LePera emphasizes the importance of regulating the nervous system so we can respond in accordance with our best selves rather than react in accordance with our inner child.
I enjoyed learning how our childhood experiences shape what we're drawn to unless we actively interrupt these patterns. The tools she provides for breaking free from these ingrained behaviors gave me the clarity and empowerment to heal in ways I hadn't considered before. I can honestly say the way I experience life now is much more grounded.
'My favourite Instagram account in the world.' Dr Rangan Chatterjee
'If LePera's Instagram feed is full of aha moments illuminating the inner workings of your psyche, the revelations in the book are more like a full firework display.' Red magazine
'This book is a must-read for anyone on a path of personal growth.' GABBY BERNSTEIN, author of number one New York Times bestsellers Super Attractor and The Universe Has Your Back
'The book I wish I had read in my twenties.' ELIZABETH DAY, author of How to Fail
Nature writer Sharman Apt Russell tells stories of her experiences tracking wildlife—mostly mammals, from mountain lions to pocket mice—near her home in New Mexico, with lessons that hold true across North America. She guides readers through the basics of identifying tracks and signs, revealing a landscape filled with the marks…
As a mama bear, I must be courageous for my three little warriors. It took a while, however, before I could activate my courage. Why? Because I had to face years of fears related to cultural shame, family guilt, inner criticism caused by oppressive patriarchal rules, and ancestral traumas. I even wrote a warm and witty memoir to capture my journey. I love sharing my stories and teaching my Courage Kit® framework to adults and kids. Fun fact: At age 8, I was a book presenter on the PBS series Reading Rainbow!
I loved learning about psychotherapist Sue Patton Thoele’s personal journey and anecdotes of other women (including moms) who found the courage to become their most authentic selves. It blew my mind to know that so many women like myself were also facing daily internal battles with self-limiting fears influenced by patriarchal norms.
Thoele hit the nail on the head when it came to naming some of those sneaky fear-based mindsets and behaviors that were embedded in my own motherhood experience, e.g., devaluing beliefs and self-sabotaging patterns. By the end of the book, I felt motivated to implement a courageous way of living. I walked away with affirmations that were geared towards transforming my subconscious fears into self-love.
Do you often find yourself meeting the wants of others at the expense of your own needs? THE COURAGE TO BE YOURSELF provides necessary tools to help you transform your fears into the courage to express your own authentic identity. By sharing her own journey and the journey of other women, Sue Patton Thoele will help you to learn how to set boundaries, change self-defeating behaviour patterns, communicate effectively and, most importantly, become a loving and tolerant friend to yourself.
I’m just an ordinary person who’s struggled with their own habits and compulsions. My fear and anxiety led me to read many self-help books over the last thirty-something years, and a lot of them helped me to firmly believe that if you start your day in the best way you can, then there’s no limit to the things that you can achieve!
Each of the books I’ve recommended has given me simple tools to help me do just that. Ultimately, I know they inspired me to create the Bad Habit Kicker system. I truly believe they can all help others optimize their lives and become the best versions of themselves!
This is an oldie but a classic in the self-help arena and a book that I’ve re-read many times. There are some real nuggets of gold in the book, including the author’s advice to live in "Day-tight compartments," and I absolutely love the 32 true-life examples that are included in the back.
It just goes to show that the simplest ideas are timeless—this book was originally published in 1948!
"""Let's not allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. Remember 'Life is too short to be little.'" An expert on interpersonal skills, Dale Carnegie gives his readers the facts of worry and techniques of dealing with it while focusing on the more important aspects of life. Drawing from high personal experience, he speaks of the golden rule for keeping your energy and spirits high. Ingrained with true stories to inspire readers in overcoming worry and moving on to success, this self-help book uses everyday nuances to help readers focus on keeping spirits high.""
As a clinical psychologist, I listen to thoughts all the time. I’m also having my own, constantly. We rely on our thoughts to help us navigate the world. However, our thoughts can also be a source of suffering. At times, they're not such reliable guides or helpers. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a way of thinking about thinking. ACT captured my imagination early in my clinical career. I trained with ACT’s originator, Steven Hayes, in the early 1990’s. I’ve come to believe that being more aware of our own thoughts, and our relationship to them is key to creating positive change and living a life grounded in our values.
Dr. Hayes is the originator of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, an innovative approach to addressing human suffering based on examining and changing our relationship to our thoughts.
This book looks at the many ways that our capacity for evaluative and judgmental thought leads to suffering. Then, it offers a map for changing how we relate to and respond to those thoughts.
It offers tools for shifting away from struggling with our internal narratives toward taking action based on our values.
"In all my years studying personal growth, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is one of the most useful tools I've ever come across, and in this book, Dr. Hayes describes it with more depth and clarity than ever before."-Mark Manson, #1 New York Times best-selling author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Life is not a problem to be solved. ACT shows how we can live full and meaningful lives by embracing our vulnerability and turning toward what hurts.
In this landmark book, the originator and pioneering researcher into Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) lays out the psychological…
The Bridge provides a compassionate and well researched window into the worlds of linear and circular thinking. A core pattern to the inner workings of these two thinking styles is revealed, and most importantly, insight into how to cross the distance between them. Some fascinating features emerged such as, circular…
For as long as I can remember, I have always wanted to make a difference—by helping others become wiser and/or happier. But how? Colleagues, clients, and friends tell me that I have a capacity for energy that is boundless. I resisted that statement. It sounded “fluffy”. How could I make a difference if I saw “energy” as being some flighty firefly? Then, when I went through 2 bouts of burnout, I realized that energy was the secret—the secret to resilience, the secret to growth and service. Reading, writing, and speaking fill me with the energy to grow, learn, laugh, and serve. I trust these books and my writing will bring the same to you.
Moving from burnout to breakthrough is about becoming clear on what really matters. Sam Horn, the most prolific and powerful wordsmith I have ever known, comes up with subtle and not-so-subtle ways of hitting you between the eyes and asking “what are you waiting for?”
Becoming clear on what really matters is not about goal setting. But rather, it’s about what makes you excited, more playful, purposeful, and passionate about your life. As with the other books, I have highlighted so much. Now, my task is not just to read but to do. Sam not only crafts a process but her method of questioning will stop you in your tracks. She has a wealth of pertinent quotes that jump out on almost every page: from Buddha to Hugh Jackman, from Anais Nin to Eleanor Roosevelt.
"Inspired me to ask myself why and to stop postponing the forgotten dreams." ―Geneen Roth, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Women Food and God and This Messy Magnificent Life
Full of inspirational insights and advice, lifehacks, and real-world examples, Someday is Not a Day in the Week is CEO Sam Horn’s motivational guide to help readers get what they want in life today rather than "someday."
Are you: • Working, working, working? • Busy taking care of everyone but yourself? • Wondering what to do with the rest of your life? • Planning to do what makes you…
