Books like The Connector's Advantage: : 7 Mindsets to Grow your Influence and Impact — picked by fans

When I read this book, the lightbulb went off. I have been in so many situations where I didn’t feel heard, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on why.

Sorenson explains that truly being connected happens only when we are validated. I never realized that almost every conversation we have is a bid for validation. We are asking others not just to hear us but also to “say something.”

The response can either be positive or engaged—a turning towards us—OR negative or passive—a turning away from us. I couldn’t have put it into these exact words, but I now know that being understood is one of the greatest of human needs and is often unmet. The book underscores that connections happen best through validation. 

“Help, I don’t know anyone” was the refrain that played over and over in my head when I moved to New York City after 30 years in Texas. Susan McPherson’s book came to my rescue. Challenging me to think about the experience and expertise I have, the book encouraged me to make connections based on how I could help others. “Make it about them,” McPherson emphasizes. “Understand their world and their circumstances and what you can offer.”

While it took soul searching, I did find ways to benefit others, from initiating introductions, to understanding challenges and finding a means to help, and taking responsibility for keeping relationships moving forward. McPherson is 100% right that connecting is a learned skill. Her book is the perfect primer. 

This book speaks to a core belief of mine–that we are all connected to each other by just a slight degree of separation. I appreciated how Burkus describes how networks of friends can be powerful even when we don’t know someone directly.

Reading the book provided an “ah-ha” moment as I realized that even old ties (dormant relationships) can provide key introductions. When I was leaving Texas to move to New York City, I wrote on the inside jacket of the book’s cover a list of people I once knew in New York who could help me start over in a brand new place. That list—and those contacts—proved invaluable in building my new life.

I have told countless people about this book; it is one of the most life-changing books I’ve ever read. Bob Beaudine offers a dramatic idea: that each of us is given 15 “who”—people who can profoundly change the course of our lives.

Our “who” consists of 12 friends, 3 close friends, and one best friend who help us achieve our goals and dreams. Each of these people has a sphere of influence and can introduce us to them. Since reading this book, I have paid much closer attention to my “who” and how to stay actively involved with them.

Whenever I need to focus on what’s most important, I remind myself to prioritize the time I devote to interacting with my “who”.

I think of Dorie Clark’s book as a companion book to mine. If you like my book, it’s likely that you’ll also get a lot of value out of reading hers. In this book, Clark focuses on helping people discover their breakthrough idea, a step that I think of as a prequel to the steps I outline for becoming a thought leader. She goes deep on the concept of the “Big Idea,” sharing some of the pathways that others have taken to distill a unique perspective or innovative differentiator that allows them to stand out. 

As I do in my book, Clark then shares her perspective on building an audience for your ideas, effectively communicating your message, and inspiring others to embrace your vision. Both books also focus on dealing with naysayers and what it takes to truly scale big ideas and create a movement that makes substantial change… show more.

This book is engaging because it shows how the base of the Democratic party has changed since Franklin Roosevelt first assembled the New Deal political coalition in the 1930s. 

Today, it is increasingly the party of college-educated suburban voters and reflects their cultural and political priorities. From the Great Depression until the 1960s, however, working-class urban voters formed the heart of the party. Geismer uses metropolitan Boston as a template to depict this important transition, which helped produce suburban candidates such as Massachusetts Governor Michael Dukakis, whose political career emerged from and was shaped by his life in Brookline, MA.  

D.J. Waldie’s writing reminds me of a Raymond Carver short story. His short, deliberate style draws the reader in immediately. You are hooked.

He walks to work. He lives in his parent’s original tract home, part of a planned development built in the 1950s in Lakewood, CA. It was the first one on the west coast. Waldie observes his friends and neighbors, the neighborhood, and its unique place in Southern California history.

After my parent’s divorce, my father lived in Lakewood and Long Beach, so I spent a lot of time down there when I was a kid. Does anyone remember Buffums department store?

This book brings together economics, education, and urban development by showing how our public policies advantaged wealthy suburbanites over less wealthy urban dwellers after World War II. Many people think there is a natural migration to the suburbs after couples have children. Jackson does a masterful job of showing why that is not the natural order of things. It is the result of specific policy choices such as how we fund infrastructure, what tax incentives we provide, who has access to credit, and how we draw political boundaries. His insights offer a blueprint for a more equitable society.

New sections of cities, new neighborhoods, and big infrastructure projects are aspirational for societies. They aren’t just about problem-solving. In this great book, historian Robert Fishman shows how London and Paris developed differently because they had different ideals and different aspirations.

As it began to grow due to industrialization in the late 18th century, London prioritized the development of townhouses, its urban ideal. This caused it to become a sprawling, low-rise city. Paris developed in the mid-19th century as a city of glamorous, stylish apartment buildings because this was Paris’s ideal.

Parisians valued the street and cultural life that apartment life generated. The title of this book is off-putting for me because it sounds so academic. But Fishman, a trained historian, writes well and gives you big ideas and details in a readable package. 

This book had one basic message, and it came down to this: Take time to put yourself first because you matter too. I love this message so much because it took me years (and I’m still working on it) to learn the importance of self-care.

Challenging relationships within my own family structure have taken a toll over the years. However, reading this book reminded me that I can take control of my own happiness and that it is not selfish to make a “Me List” and make myself happy, too.