Books like Negotiating While Black

As the mom of an extreme introvert, I listened to this book to better understand my child. It taught me so much about how introverts think, process information, but most importantly, what they need around communication. As a leader, understanding the differences in the way people think, work, and engage will enable you to get the most out of them.

I retrained myself to approach my daughter differently as a result of this book. It helped me explain myself to her and made her feel understood by me. Grateful for this book. Imagine if we did that in the workplace!

We have more in common than we realize. I’m not hard of hearing, nor did I grow up in a generation before digital hearing aids existed. But Claudia’s book transported me through that experience and stresses that while our experiences and identities might be different, the pain of unseen, unheard, and isolated is universally human.

When I’m impatient with progress, Claudia’s journey reminds me of how far we can come with technology, understanding, and awareness in a generation, how deeply impacted we are by the people in our families and communities, and how we can each make a difference in how we experience the world. 

Self-care always seemed so fluffy and out of reach for me. There’s no way that going to the spa or having bubble baths solves the real challenges real people face. I love Pooja’s book because it looks at the systemic issues while making self-care real and practical.

I know I need to take care of myself. I’ve heard all the stuff about putting on your own oxygen mask before helping someone else, and my response has always been “yeahhhh, but.” My biggest takeaway from the book? Boundaries are not co-created.

This is the book that changed my world. I’d never felt like I really fit in at work or, frankly, in many of the communities that I lived in. As much as I contorted myself or took people’s feedback, something always felt off. I worked hard. I learned to talk like the successful leaders around me. I played by the rules. But I was still always second string. I thought I was the problem.

From the first time I came across this title to reading it through with tears in my eyes—it finally clicked. All along, it wasn’t because I wasn’t smart, kind, hard-working, thoughtful, or likable enough. It was that the workplaces I was in all centered on Whiteness, to the detriment of everyone who wasn’t White. 

I love this book because of its very specific tips and useful strategies for working with people from countries different than my own. I was able to better understand the culture of each country through concise descriptions of their history, language, educational system, religions, and demographics.

I appreciate that it’s organized in a methodical and consistent fashion that helped me skip to my areas of interest without having to use the table of contents or index to find what I was looking for. I also found this book a ‘must-have’ for my work in leading cross-cultural teams because it helped me to understand and appreciate different cognitive styles, negotiation strategies, value systems, and business practices. Whether you travel globally on business or for pleasure this is a wonderful resource guide.

This is not only one of the best books on politics, but on people’s behavior in social media and beyond. Grandstanding, Warmke and Tosi say, is the use of moral language for the purpose of self-promotion.

For example, my neighbors put up political signs that say “No human is illegal” even though those same neighbors (unlike me) in fact advocate closed borders, suppose immigration restrictions, and want to deport illegal immigrants. (In contrast, I actually advocate open borders, though my lawn remains silent about my politics.)

The point of this behavior is like praying in public—it’s about trying to impress other people and convince them you’re a good person. 

Today, people are in a kind of moral arms-race with each other, each trying to prove they’re better than others. This explains why people are dismissive of evidence, tend to have over-the-top, exaggerated emotional reactions, make exaggerated moral complaints, or invent… show more.

This book is a practical guide to delivering news you’d rather not have to deliver. As someone who has avoided my share of difficult conversations that should have been had years ago, I very much appreciate the step-by-step framework this book provides.

With an emphasis on preparation, compassion, and follow-up, this book explains that delicate but productive conversations are rarely one-time events, but multiple, structured conversations. And while the book is for the person delivering the bad news, the authors are careful to explain that it's not about the person delivering the bad news, but the one receiving it, that matters if a difficult conversation is to be productive. This book is a must for anyone who regularly manages other people or has fraught business relationships.

Kathy loved this book by Jane Dutton, and found herself exclaiming, “Yes!” as she read through this book that validated the energy she did receive abundantly through small moments of connection at work!

As a senior executive, Kathy could have thousands of people in her organization. Wanting to know each and every one of them was a luxury she could not afford, so she did her best to make those opportunities she did have for meaningful connections, no matter how brief, to count for her and the other person with whom she was interacting.

Jane systematically provides the science of how and why this works, along with so many useful tools for those to whom this does not come naturally!

Have you ever found that you unintentionally offended someone with an innocuous message? Or perhaps no one responds to your emails, even when you think they should.

We lose so much meaning and context when we interact online rather than in person. In a world of virtual and hybrid work, it’s not enough to write well. We must also master the non-verbal signals that accompany our words. This book is an essential guide to mastering the subtle ins and outs of writing emails, messages, texts, social media posts, and more.

This is one of those books that completely changes the way you understand a subject.

Clanchy looks at how the growth of bureaucracy in England fostered the growth of literacy and changed the world in the process. That’s an important subject in its own right, but I love this book for all of the little details it includes.

It’s full of information about how the definition of literacy has changed over time, how knights and kings were educated, how courts functioned, how oral testimony was heard, how records were kept, how books were produced, how much it cost to produce them, and how forgery developed.

This is very much an academic book, but it explores a whole range of practices and attitudes that have shaped the world we live in.