Here are 100 books that Girls & Sex fans have personally recommended if you like
Girls & Sex.
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In 2015, I had a meltdown. I was finishing my PhD, teaching two classes, consulting, and was the “alpha parent” to two small children. It was overwhelming, and I was pulling away from work to survive. As a gender specialist, I knew all the data around gender norms and inequality. And here I was, falling into the same trap! Long story short, my husband and I made many changes at home. And I altered my work. I still do international projects, but I also do research and writing about gender inequality in North America, using my expertise to address inequality in my community and helping others with their own meltdowns.
I am a wee bit obsessed with mysteries. This is my genre of choice for vacations, plane rides, and the occasional lazy afternoon. And I love the way that Barbara Neely blends a classic whodunnit with the topic of gender equality. Barbara Neely, who is now deceased, left the world with a gem of a 4-book series about Blanche White, who is a domestic worker by profession—and an accidental sleuth on the side.
But what I love most about this series is the way Neely weaves huge issues like misogyny, racism, classism, and violence through her story while delivering a smart, page-turning mystery. In her own words, “fiction is a good place to do activism.”
Award-winning author Barbara Neely presents the first in a series of novels featuring Blanche White, bla ck domestic worker extraordinaire and accidental sleuth. '
The problem is not with the actions young women take but with the toxic, sexist conditions they are responding to.
Tanenbaum found, based on six years of interviews with young people ages 14-30, that young women are navigating a culture littered with gendered dress codes, revenge porn, and sexually explicit…
In 2015, I had a meltdown. I was finishing my PhD, teaching two classes, consulting, and was the “alpha parent” to two small children. It was overwhelming, and I was pulling away from work to survive. As a gender specialist, I knew all the data around gender norms and inequality. And here I was, falling into the same trap! Long story short, my husband and I made many changes at home. And I altered my work. I still do international projects, but I also do research and writing about gender inequality in North America, using my expertise to address inequality in my community and helping others with their own meltdowns.
We are doing a great job of dismantling the glass ceiling held over our daughters and changing the way we raise girls. We tell our girls, “You can do anything,” and “Don’t let your gender hold you back!” But we are not doing the same for our sons. And that is why I love this book.
This book is written for a YA reader, but it is also great for parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, religious leaders, teachers, and coaches—really, anyone with a boy in their life. It helps all of us better understand how we should raise boys. We should teach them empathy, create caregiving opportunities for them, and teach them the words they need to express themselves.
Packed with 100 inspiring, creative, fun challenges for boys, this project from violence-prevention organization A Call to Men answers parents' cries for building healthy manhood, respect, and emotional awareness in their sons.
Dare to prove a stereotype wrong
Dare to watch a movie about someone who's different from you
Dare to ask a friend to teach you something they're good at
Dare to be a leader This collection of 100 original dares will help boys expand their worldview, inspire more respect toward girls and non-binary kids, and generally develop a healthier idea of manhood.
In 2015, I had a meltdown. I was finishing my PhD, teaching two classes, consulting, and was the “alpha parent” to two small children. It was overwhelming, and I was pulling away from work to survive. As a gender specialist, I knew all the data around gender norms and inequality. And here I was, falling into the same trap! Long story short, my husband and I made many changes at home. And I altered my work. I still do international projects, but I also do research and writing about gender inequality in North America, using my expertise to address inequality in my community and helping others with their own meltdowns.
You can’t talk about gender equality without tackling care—that women are expected to do it all, that somehow, we don’t think men are capable. Kate Washington (who has become a personal friend of mine and is a lovely human) takes on this topic with grace and humility.
The book is an easy-to-read story about Kate’s personal story of taking care of her husband through his fight with cancer. But she also manages to sneak in data points and teach an overall lesson about gender and caregiving. I listened to this book over several Sunday afternoons, folding laundry and cleaning—and I highly recommend the audiobook. The narrator had a soothing and familiar voice that made me miss her when I finished.
The story of one woman’s struggle to care for her seriously ill husband—and a revealing look at the role unpaid family caregivers play in a society that fails to provide them with structural support.
Already Toast shows how all-consuming caregiving can be, how difficult it is to find support, and how the social and literary narratives that have long locked women into providing emotional labor also keep them in unpaid caregiving roles. When Kate Washington and her husband, Brad, learned that he had cancer, they were a young couple: professionals with ascending careers, parents to two small children. Brad’s diagnosis…
The problem is not with the actions young women take but with the toxic, sexist conditions they are responding to.
Tanenbaum found, based on six years of interviews with young people ages 14-30, that young women are navigating a culture littered with gendered dress codes, revenge porn, and sexually explicit…
In 2015, I had a meltdown. I was finishing my PhD, teaching two classes, consulting, and was the “alpha parent” to two small children. It was overwhelming, and I was pulling away from work to survive. As a gender specialist, I knew all the data around gender norms and inequality. And here I was, falling into the same trap! Long story short, my husband and I made many changes at home. And I altered my work. I still do international projects, but I also do research and writing about gender inequality in North America, using my expertise to address inequality in my community and helping others with their own meltdowns.
A critical component of the gender equality booklist is trans rights, which is why I recommend this autobiography. I hesitate to say too much about it—because I just think the best thing to do is dive in and read this for yourself. I will say that the words Chloe chooses and the way she talks about her own transition—it was surprising, and heartbreaking, and insightful, and beautiful—all at the same time.
Chloe has also become a friend of mine, and I can say that she is every bit as tenacious and lovable in person as she is on the page. I often give this book as a gift to people who are thinking of, in the middle of, or are supporting a loved one through a gender transition.
SELF-ish is a narrative drawn from an international life, beginning with some early glimpses out at the world by a girl in a boy's body. Chloe Schwenke was raised as Stephen in a Marine Corps family, and was sent off at age fourteen to "man-up" at a military academy. Later-and still embodied as a man-she ventured abroad to work in some of the roughest regions of Africa, the Gaza Strip, Turkey, and many other locales. Her far-flung global journey was matched in intensity by an inner identity and spiritual struggle and the associated ravages of depression, before she came to…
I am passionate about in-depth character development because it’s something I strive for in my own writing. Humans are very complex creatures who are capable of a full range of responses on any given day, moment, or set of circumstances. Offering readers an opportunity to consider what motivates characters to behave in the ways they do makes a story worth sinking your teeth into. I think making these kinds of considerations about characters who are not real also opens up our collective ability to exercise our empathy muscles in real life. These days, we need that more than ever.
I love the strong, authentic female voice and the sheer craft of Shreve’s writing style. Honestly, I felt like I’d just eaten a piece of cake when I finished reading this book the first time, and I’ve definitely gone back for seconds and thirds. Each time I’ve reread this book, I find another beautiful facet to appreciate.
The pacing of the storytelling is exceptional, and Shreve doesn’t flinch from describing visceral scenes that are essential to the story. I love how much you need all five of your senses to read this story. This book was my first introduction to this writer, and I’ve read everything of hers that I can get my hands on.
Set 100 years ago in Boston, Fortune's Rocks is a classic of literary and romantic storytelling. Fourteen-year-old Olympic Biddeford is spending the summer with her parents at their seasonal house at Fortune's Rocks. Her father handles her education himself and is in fact a publisher of mildly liberal literature. One author he admires, who also practises as a physician, comes to visit the house. 40 years old, married with four children, he still embarks on an affair with the adolescent girl. They have a swift, passionate summer, torn apart when they are discovered together during Olympic's fifteenth birthday party. She…
When I finished my second book, which followed the life course of women in the U.S. in the early 20th century, I was left with questions and some confusion about women’s sexuality in the period. Books and magazine articles at the time obsessively discussed young women and their sexual freedom. But young women’s journals, and the psychological literature showed that publicly, young women performed a heterosexual script, but privately, and emotionally, they often remained far more comfortable with other girls and young women. Slowly it became clear that the real sexual revolution of the 20th century was the triumph of heterosexual relations and norms during the 1920s until the 1940s.
This is a tour de force on the lives of girls and young women in the era of World War II and the 1950s.
Littauer makes use of non-traditional sources to show how young women negotiated a sexual landscape that was rapidly changing and which gave them more choices and often more control over their sexuality.
During the war years, young women found that the rapid mobilization and unsettled conditions near military bases gave them opportunities for sexual adventures that settle times would never allow.
And during the post-war, within the “going steady” practices of the time, women could become sexually active with some protection from social stigma.
In this innovative and revealing study of midcentury American sex and culture, Amanda Littauer traces the origins of the "sexual revolution" of the 1960s. She argues that sexual liberation was much more than a reaction to 1950s repression because it largely involved the mainstreaming of a counterculture already on the rise among girls and young women decades earlier. From World War II-era "victory girls" to teen lesbians in the 1940s and 1950s, these nonconforming women and girls navigated and resisted intense social and interpersonal pressures to fit existing mores, using the upheavals of the era to pursue new sexual freedoms.…
I coined the term “slut-bashing,” the precursor to “slut-shaming,” and am passionate about exploring the ways that girls and young women behave and cope in a culture of slut-shaming. I also am curious about how they face other unique challenges—such as the risk of harassment and assault, the pressures to achieve an impossible beauty ideal, and others. All girls and women experience sexism, while many girls of color— and lesbian, queer, and trans girls— face numerous intersecting pressures. The works I recommend here are aching, powerful, and unforgettable.
This play, inspired by the experiences of a racially diverse group of New York City teenage girls, explores the intersection of slut-shaming and sexual violence. At its core, the play questions the wisdom of girls embracing the “slut” label for themselves. “Slut” may seem like a carefree term of endearment, and it is—until the moment Joey, a member of her school’s dance team, informally known as the Slut Squad, is sexually assaulted by two boys from school. She brings charges against them, and every sexually provocative thing she previously has done is used as evidence that she is lying. If you want to understand the pressures teenage girls face today, this play breaks it down for you.
SLUT: The Play offers communities and individuals the real-life insight into rape and bullying culture necessary to inspire change in the attitudes and practices surrounding girls and sexuality. The story and the performance creates much-needed space to discuss—openly and honestly—experiences with shaming, sex, and violence, thus providing a crucial antidote to slut-shaming culture.
My name is K. E. Garland, and I am a recovering female sex addict. I didn’t know it until I was 42. In 2014, I had a rock-bottom moment that forced me to confront my compulsions. I self-therapized through writing. As a blogger, I described ways I’d buried interrelated traumas. During the nine years it took for me to research and write my memoir, there were few books about female sex addiction. Now, there are several! The books I’ve recommended not only provide a well-rounded understanding of a little-known phenomenon, but they also help to demarginalize stories of how women live with behavioral addictions. I hope you’ll find them useful.
I really enjoyed this book because it was the first narrative I read about a woman who was only a sex addict. Sex addiction is primarily viewed as something men (and out-of-control celebrities) deal with. I thought I was alone as a female sex addict until I read about Cohen’s life.
Her book helped me feel less alone, and it showed me that I shouldn’t be ashamed to tell my story. I saw myself in each of her experiences, especially when she described being a sex-craved teenager.
Loose Girl is Kerry Cohen's captivating memoir about her descent into promiscuity and how she gradually found her way toward real intimacy. The story of addiction-not just to sex, but to male attention-Loose Girl is also the story of a young woman who came to believe that boys and men could give her life meaning.
For everyone who knew that girl.
In rich and immediate detail, Loose Girl re-creates what it feels like to be in that desperate moment, when a you try to control someone by handing over your body, when the touch…
I have been practicing some flavor of non-monogamy for over a decade now—and how much has changed in the past few years! In my coaching practice, I’ve seen an increase in clients who are trying to evaluate what kind of relationship is best for them. Many people know that the traditional dating game and lifelong monogamy are not for them, but they also feel concerned, intimidated, or confused by exploring non-monogamy. These books have helped many of my clients get perspective on how non-monogamous relationships work in real life.
People who are non-monogamous often feel pressure to portray their relationships in the most positive light possible in the face of daily stigma, judgment, and pushback. Not so with Rachel Krantz’s Open. Krantz’s memoir takes the reader through the trials and tribulations of her first polyamorous relationship, refusing to leave out the gritty, sexy, and sometimes uncomfortable details. In addition to sharing her story, Krantz also includes relationship wisdom from a wide variety of perspectives—therapists, sex workers, and even a Buddhist monk. This book offers a refreshingly real take on polyamory, including the dark pitfalls as well as moments of unadulterated ecstasy and joy.
An unprecedented exploration of polyamory and gaslighting, from an award-winning journalist chronicling her first open relationship with unflinching candor as she explores this fast-growing movement
“[A] sincere and curious reckoning with the cultural messaging we all receive about gendered expectations and power dynamics in romantic and sexual relationships.”—NPR
ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: PopSugar
Can we have both freedom and love? Comfort and lust? Is a relationship ever equal? And is the pleasure worth the pain?
When Rachel Krantz met and fell for Adam, he told her that he was looking for a committed partnership—just one that…
When I think of who I am, as a writer and a human being, I remember the words of prolific Portland poet Dan Rapheal, who wrote the foreword to my book of poetry, Blue Reverie in Smoke: “...the reader must look carefully to get a full picture of the poet herself—tender, no nonsense, quietly observing and juggernauting to make things as she thinks they should be.” I’ve never forgotten Dan’s astute appraisal of me, and it surprised me. It seems that's how I’ve always been—someone who quietly observes, never unmoved by what I see, just trying to make sense of it, sometimes successful in that endeavor, and oftentimes, not successful at all.
In Suicide Blonde, the lead character Jesse tries to sustain a connection with her beautiful bisexual boyfriend, Bell, who though he loves her, cannot refuse the allure of sex with strange men and seems to be regularly “dipped in sleaze.” Jesse becomes caretaker of Madam Pig, an old obese beauty queen who lives in a crumbling old house. The paint peels in the wind with only vacant lots and industrial buildings nearby, as Madam Pig swills red wine and vomits down staircases. I loved this book for the lonely dystopian feel and the way Jesse seems utterly alone in the world. I also loved the natural way Stienke writes about sex. I learned a great deal from her graphic content, learning how to actually write sex into litertaure. The book is not for the faint of heart and does not have a happy ending, but in its way, it…
Jesse is a twenty-nine-year-old adrift in San Francisco's demi-monde of sexually ambiguous, drug-taking outsiders, desperately trying to sustain a connection with her bisexual boyfriend. She becomes caretaker and confidante to Madame Pig, a grotesque, besotted recluse. Jesse also meets Madison - Pig's daughter or lover or both - who uses others' desires for her own purposes, and who leads Jesse into a world beyond all boundaries.
As startling, original and vital as it was when first published, Suicide Blonde is an intensely erotic story of one young woman's sexual and psychological odyssey, and a modern cult classic.
