Books like Awake at the Bedside

I’m not a clinician, but friends often ask for my advice when they get sick or need help caring for a loved one. I’ve spent nearly 25 years mapping the terrain created by innovative patients, survivors, and caregivers, the rebels of medical care. I’m also a caregiver to elders. Along the way, I’ve collected books to loan when someone facing a health challenge asks me, “What do I do now?” Each of these five books was written for when you find yourself in the healthcare maze and need to borrow courage, sharpen your senses, and navigate as best you can.

I have spent the last 50 years exploring the intersection of Eastern and Western thought and spirituality. Along the way, I experientially learned the details of three of my former lifetimes: as a rabbi in 3rd-century Alexandria, as a tantric yogini and follower of Achi Chokyi Nyima in China, and as the legendary courtesan Lady Mori, who became the disciple and lover of the Zen master Ikkyu in 15th-century Japan. Studying the ways my previous incarnations are interconnected has taught me much about how the principles of karma and reincarnation function in real-time in the actual world, and I treasure the opportunity to share these insights with you.

I have accompanied dying people for more than twenty-five years—as a counsellor, volunteer chaplain, and companion. I feel passionate about changing the perception of dying and death, the way we care for people during their most vulnerable moments, and how we support families through this painful time. Since my twenties I have been immersed in Buddhist practise which inspires and informs my life and work. Together with other clinicians and mindfulness practitioners, we created one of the first contemplative-based training in end-of-life care for caregivers called “Authentic Presence”. Daring to be present might be the hardest thing you may have done in your life, and, you may come to discover, one of the most intimate, beautiful, and rewarding.

I have accompanied dying people for more than twenty-five years—as a counsellor, volunteer chaplain, and companion. I feel passionate about changing the perception of dying and death, the way we care for people during their most vulnerable moments, and how we support families through this painful time. Since my twenties I have been immersed in Buddhist practise which inspires and informs my life and work. Together with other clinicians and mindfulness practitioners, we created one of the first contemplative-based training in end-of-life care for caregivers called “Authentic Presence”. Daring to be present might be the hardest thing you may have done in your life, and, you may come to discover, one of the most intimate, beautiful, and rewarding.

To care for the dying is not only strenuous physically, emotionally, and spiritually, but it is a challenge in self-care and a constant call to remain non-judgmental. As someone who struggled financially as a single mother for many years, I discovered that compassion and empathy were needed not only for my children but also myself—indeed self-love was at the core of all. Working with the elderly in residential care, in hospice, and with individuals and families I now teach community deathcare with an edge of social activism to help the vulnerable feel safe while living and while dying.

I’m a Buddhist teacher and author of six books. I started practicing Buddhist meditation in 1980 and then got sober in 1985. The fact that I needed the 12 Steps when I was already a serious meditator gives you a clue about what a mess I was. Besides addiction, I’ve struggled with depression as well. All of this makes me feel like something of an outsider in the “happy, happy” world of mindfulness and meditation. Much of my work comes from that outsider’s perspective. While five of my books focus on connecting Buddhism and recovery, the sixth comes out of my study of the suttas of the Pali Canon, the earliest preserved Buddhist teachings.

I’m a Buddhist teacher and author of six books. I started practicing Buddhist meditation in 1980 and then got sober in 1985. The fact that I needed the 12 Steps when I was already a serious meditator gives you a clue about what a mess I was. Besides addiction, I’ve struggled with depression as well. All of this makes me feel like something of an outsider in the “happy, happy” world of mindfulness and meditation. Much of my work comes from that outsider’s perspective. While five of my books focus on connecting Buddhism and recovery, the sixth comes out of my study of the suttas of the Pali Canon, the earliest preserved Buddhist teachings.

In my view, there is no bigger quest than to understand how to live a long and fulfilled life. Most of my professional life has focused on running neuroscience experiments in my academic laboratory and developing technologies for companies I have started to understand and increase happiness. I have devoted 20 years to this quest and I continue to work to build a happier and healthier world. I am one of the most cited scientists in this area and also regularly communicate to the general public through TED talks, books, magazine articles, and public lectures.    

I’ve always been drawn to the connection between the physical and the mental and how small, repeated actions shape who we become. I started searching for meaning because life knocked me to my knees and left me with questions I couldn’t ignore. Everything I thought I was certain about came undone, and I was left trying to figure out what to do with the pieces.

What I learned the hard way is that real change doesn’t come from answers; it comes from what we survive and who we decide to become afterward. I write from inside those lessons, where purpose is discovered through experience, missteps, and the resolve to keep going. These books will shape you—enjoy!

I became Buddhist while I was working in Southeast Asia, in Thailand specifically. Here’s one of the great lessons I learned, or perhaps it’s merely a koan, and that is this, no true Buddhist is Buddhist. It’s my own saying and one that I live by because Zen, Tibetan or Theravada are all structured disciplines with ritual and even recognized leaders. And I think the Buddha would laugh one of his full bellied roars to learn that there were, in some cases, global organizations all named in his honor. That’s not to make light of the way of organized Buddhism, merely to say that it isn’t my way.