Here are 100 books that This Is How It Always Is fans have personally recommended if you like This Is How It Always Is. Book DNA is a community of 12,000+ authors and super readers sharing their favorite books with the world.

When you buy books, we may earn a commission that helps keep our lights on (or join the rebellion as a member).

Book cover of Nightbitch

Kerry Donoghue Author Of Mouth

From my list on messy women.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m Gen X, through and through. And because I grew up in that (glorious?) time before social media, I didn’t have the worry that my messy-woman missteps would be exposed online. But the trade-off to keeping my mistakes as private as possible was that I often felt like I couldn’t live boldly. So now I’m fascinated by the ways other women handle the messier aspects of their lives: the obsessions and frustrations, the secrets we all keep, the duality we choke down. I want to know what we’re each quietly starving for, what’s driving us when we strip away social expectation and are left to sit with our gnawing hungers. 

Kerry's book list on messy women

Kerry Donoghue Why Kerry loves this book

I’ve got two kiddos, and between the bodily, emotional, and lifestyle changes alone, I’ve found motherhood to be a WILD ride. And I’ve never felt more seen as a mom than in this book.

From the heartbreaking joy to the numbing boredom to the rage and the shocking invisibility that can come with motherhood, particularly during those early days, it made perfect sense to me that the main character turns into a dog. Because motherhood does shape you into something else.

This book captures that loss, that feral transformation, perfectly. Also, I wish I’d come up with the title. 

By Rachel Yoder ,

Why should I read it?

7 authors picked Nightbitch as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In this blazingly smart and voracious debut novel, an artist turned stay-at-home mom becomes convinced she's turning into a dog. • "A must-read for anyone who can’t get enough of the ever-blurring line between the psychological and supernatural that Yellowjackets exemplifies." —Vulture

One day, the mother was a mother, but then one night, she was quite suddenly something else...

An ambitious mother puts her art career on hold to stay at home with her newborn son, but the experience does not match her imagination. Two years later, she steps into the bathroom for a break from her toddler's demands, only…


If you love This Is How It Always Is...

Book cover of Performance Anxiety

Performance Anxiety by Jonathan Lerner,

Lerner's memoir of approaching adulthood in the mid-sixties is deliciously readable, but deceptively breezy. His family is affluent, his school engaging, his friends smart and fun. He has his first car, and drives with abandon. The American moment promises unlimited possibility. But political and cultural upheavals are emerging, and irresistible.…

Book cover of The Whispers

Caitlin Weaver Author Of Such a Good Family

From my list on tackle the messy emotions of motherhood.

Why am I passionate about this?

Becoming a mother rocked my world in countless ways, drawing me to books that explore the raw, unfiltered truth about how challenging motherhood can be. The complexities—the love, guilt, and frustration—resonate deeply with me. Motherhood is also why I started writing; initially, I wanted to process the overwhelming emotions I was feeling. When I began sharing my writing with friends, their “Yeah, me too's” made me realize I wasn’t alone. I have deep respect for authors who can capture the messiness of motherhood so honestly, and I’m inspired by their ability to put into words what so many of us experience.

Caitlin's book list on tackle the messy emotions of motherhood

Caitlin Weaver Why Caitlin loves this book

This book is an unflinchingly honest portrayal of the pressure moms feel to appear perfect, all while grappling with the realities of parenting in a world that demands so much of us. It addresses head-on the silent struggles and unspoken fears that many women face.

Audrain does a brilliant job of putting into words the conflicting emotions of love, guilt, and frustration that often accompany motherhood. It follows four women, all of whom I loved and hated at different moments, and explores how the weight of expectations can drive women to their breaking points.

It’s dark suburbia at its best, and it takes time to peel back the layers of the characters’ seemingly perfect lives until we can see the painful, messy truths underneath. 

By Ashley Audrain ,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked The Whispers as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

“Expertly, subtly and powerfully rendered….[The Whispers] delivers a sucker-punch ending you’ll have to read twice to believe.”—The New York Times Book Review

“[An] electrifying…razor-sharp page-turner.” —Carley Fortune, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Every Summer After

Featured in summer reading recommendations by Good Morning America, TIME, ELLE, The Washington Post & more

From the New York Times bestselling author of The Push, a propulsive page-turner about four families whose lives are changed when the unthinkable happens—and what is lost when we give in to our own worst impulses

On Harlow Street, the well-to-do neighborhood couples and their children gather…


Book cover of The Mother Act

Caitlin Weaver Author Of Such a Good Family

From my list on tackle the messy emotions of motherhood.

Why am I passionate about this?

Becoming a mother rocked my world in countless ways, drawing me to books that explore the raw, unfiltered truth about how challenging motherhood can be. The complexities—the love, guilt, and frustration—resonate deeply with me. Motherhood is also why I started writing; initially, I wanted to process the overwhelming emotions I was feeling. When I began sharing my writing with friends, their “Yeah, me too's” made me realize I wasn’t alone. I have deep respect for authors who can capture the messiness of motherhood so honestly, and I’m inspired by their ability to put into words what so many of us experience.

Caitlin's book list on tackle the messy emotions of motherhood

Caitlin Weaver Why Caitlin loves this book

I loved this book's raw, unflinching exploration of a taboo topic: the quiet regret some mothers carry. Through Sadie, a fierce Broadway star and feminist icon, and her daughter Jude, an actress on the brink of her own fame, Reimer paints a portrait that's complex and so intimate it’s almost uncomfortable at times.

I appreciated how neither woman was cast as the villain, and in their struggle, I found I could relate to both of them at different moments. Cleverly structured as a play in six acts, this novel is a beautifully written, compulsive read that asks the hard question: can a woman truly be both a devoted mother and a devoted artist?

By Heidi Reimer ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Mother Act as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Set against the sparkling backdrop of the theater world, this propulsive debut follows the relationship between an actress who refuses to abandon her career and the daughter she chooses to abandon instead.

Sadie Jones, a larger-than-life actress and controversial feminist, never wanted to be a mother. No one feels this more deeply than Jude, the daughter Sadie left behind. While Jude spent her childhood touring with her father’s Shakespearian theater company, desperate for validation from the mother she barely knew, Sadie catapulted to fame on the wings of The Mother Act—a scathing one-woman show about motherhood.

Two decades later, Jude…


If you love Laurie Frankel...

Book cover of A Fine Layer of Dust

A Fine Layer of Dust by Barbara Conrey,

A haunting portrait of what happens when ambition, grief, and guilt collide. Some books break your heart. Others help you pick up the pieces. A Fine Layer of Dust does both.

After one irreversible moment tears two families apart, everyone must confront the impossible choices that shaped them. This is…

Book cover of All They Ask Is Everything

Caitlin Weaver Author Of Such a Good Family

From my list on tackle the messy emotions of motherhood.

Why am I passionate about this?

Becoming a mother rocked my world in countless ways, drawing me to books that explore the raw, unfiltered truth about how challenging motherhood can be. The complexities—the love, guilt, and frustration—resonate deeply with me. Motherhood is also why I started writing; initially, I wanted to process the overwhelming emotions I was feeling. When I began sharing my writing with friends, their “Yeah, me too's” made me realize I wasn’t alone. I have deep respect for authors who can capture the messiness of motherhood so honestly, and I’m inspired by their ability to put into words what so many of us experience.

Caitlin's book list on tackle the messy emotions of motherhood

Caitlin Weaver Why Caitlin loves this book

I was captivated by this book, which tackles every mother’s worst nightmare: losing your children because of a mistake you’ve made. It’s a gripping and original spin on the “it takes a village” concept, as three women—a mother, foster mother, and grandmother—fight for custody of the same children.

I’m drawn to books that tell the raw truth about how hard motherhood can be, and this novel does it beautifully. The theme of how difficult it is to ask for help, even when you’re on the brink of desperation, resonated with me deeply. It’s a powerful, thought-provoking read.

By Hadley Leggett ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked All They Ask Is Everything as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In this hopeful debut about the silent struggles of motherhood, three very different women want custody of the same two little girls-and learn they have more in common than the children they're fighting for.

Determined to be a better mother than her own, Hannah has devoted her life to her daughters. She ignores her increasing exhaustion and isolation as a widowed mom-until a disastrous mistake lands the girls in foster care.

Julie is single and lonely and dreams of being a mother. After infertility issues lead her to foster parenting, she falls head over heels for Hannah's daughters. The more…


Book cover of The Couple Next Door

Dita Dow Author Of Sins in Black

From my list on small-town mystery books for fans of secrets, lies & twists.

Why am I passionate about this?

As a suspense thriller author and retired police detective, I’ve seen how ordinary people can hide the darkest secrets. That’s why I love small-town mysteries. They show the endless ways people cover up what they don’t want others to see, and they remind me of the unsettling truth I’ve witnessed firsthand: behind every neat house and familiar smile, there can be lies, betrayal, or danger and nothing is ever as safe as it looks.

Dita's book list on small-town mystery books for fans of secrets, lies & twists

Dita Dow Why Dita loves this book

I loved The Couple Next Door because it kept me glued to the page from start to finish.

I was fascinated by how an ordinary neighborhood could hide so much tension and deceit. It made me question how well we really know the people living right beside us. I found myself holding my breath, completely absorbed, and I couldn’t put it down until I knew everything.

By Shari Lapena ,

Why should I read it?

6 authors picked The Couple Next Door as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

Another thrilling domestic suspense novel from the New York Times bestselling author of Not a Happy Family

"The twists come as fast [as] you can turn the pages." -People

"I read this novel at one sitting, absolutely riveted by the storyline. The suspense was beautifully rendered and unrelenting!" -Sue Grafton

It all started at a dinner party. . .

A domestic suspense debut about a young couple and their apparently friendly neighbors-a twisty, rollercoaster ride of lies, betrayal, and the secrets between husbands and wives. . .

Anne and Marco Conti seem to have it…


Book cover of The Red Pyramid

Susan McCormick Author Of The Antidote

From my list on middle-grade YA fantasies entertain and educate.

Why am I passionate about this?

As a doctor, writer, and mother of middle schoolers, I was ready to scintillate the sixth-graders when I volunteered for the chicken wing dissection class, demonstrating the exciting connection between muscles, tendons, and bones. I opened and closed the wing, placed it in their hands, and showed them the thin strips of tissue coordinating all the action. Did I see fascination? Excitement? Feigned interest of any sort? Sadly, no. They were much more enthusiastic about a different topic I volunteered for. Mythology. Greek gods. Beasts with multiple heads. They knew everything, and I knew books like Rick Riordan’s The Lightning Thief series were the reason. Books can entertain and educate.

Susan's book list on middle-grade YA fantasies entertain and educate

Susan McCormick Why Susan loves this book

Another great series from Rick Riordan. Set somewhat in the real world, a brother and a sister who don’t look alike discover they are descended from long line of a family of both Egyptian pharaohs and magicians. They have special talents to battle gods from Egyptian mythology and must save their father and the world.

Again, so much history and mythology packed into an exciting adventure story. Our whole family loved it.

By Rick Riordan ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Red Pyramid as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The Red Pyramid: the first book in Rick Riordan's The Kane Chronicles.

Percy Jackson fought Greek Gods. Now the Gods of Egypt are waking in the modern world...

'I GUESS IT STARTED THE NIGHT OUR DAD BLEW UP THE BRITISH MUSEUM . . .'

CARTER AND SADIE KANE'S dad is a brilliant Egyptologist with a secret plan that goes horribly wrong. An explosion shatters the ancient Rosetta stone and unleashes Set, the evil god of chaos . . .

Set imprisons Dr Kane in a golden coffin and Carter and Sadie must run for their lives. To save their dad,…


Book cover of Blue Labyrinth

J.M. Adams Author Of Second Term

From my list on fearless female warriors.

Why am I passionate about this?

Female warriors add more depth to the action/thriller genre and make any character infinitely more interesting. I’ve read and watched enough Jacks, Johns, and Jakes to last a lifetime and I want some Janes in my reading life. I’ve been an avid reader for more than 40 years and always felt that there was a blank space when it comes to female protagonists. Many of my favorite female characters were relegated to supporting roles including some on my list, but when I find a great female character I end up reading her again and again. And if you haven’t seen it yet, watch Lioness on Amazon, it will leave you breathless! 

J.M.'s book list on fearless female warriors

J.M. Adams Why J.M. loves this book

When it comes to Constance Greene, I hardly know where to begin.

She’s certainly the oldest and most deadly character in fiction writing today. I say she’s the oldest because she’s trapped in the body of a thirty-something-year-old woman even though she was born in 1873, long story.

She appears as a supporting character in multiple novels, as the love interest of Detective Aloysius Pendergast, but she is so much more than that. She’s eloquent, brilliant, and does not succumb to emotional distress under any threat of death.

In Blue Labyrinth, eight highly trained mercenaries pursue her and none of them live to tell the tale. At her most ruthless, she can kill with any tool at her disposal and she is loyal to the man she loves.

By Douglas Preston , Lincoln Child ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Blue Labyrinth as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?


When a longtime enemy shows up dead on Pendergast's doorstep, the murder investigation leads him into his own dark past as a vengeful killer waits in the shadows.

It begins with murder. One of Pendergast's most implacable, most feared enemies is found on his doorstep, dead. Pendergast has no idea who is responsible for the killing, or why the body was brought to his home. The mystery has all the hallmarks of the perfect crime, save for an enigmatic clue: a piece of turquoise lodged in the stomach of the deceased.

The gem leads Pendergast to an abandoned mine on…


Book cover of The Dead Season

Elena Taylor Author Of All We Buried

From my list on female sleuths in small, rural towns.

Why am I passionate about this?

I started reading crime fiction when I was a very young child. My granny introduced me to mysteries through authors like Tony Hillerman, who wrote books set in the Four Corners region of the American Southwest. That early introduction into mysteries set in small towns and rural areas stuck. My books also focus on smaller towns and rural areas, which I love to visit through fiction or in real life. I have often made my home in a small town and work as a crime fiction author and a developmental editor, so I have an eye for both solid mysteries and life in a rural community.

Elena's book list on female sleuths in small, rural towns

Elena Taylor Why Elena loves this book

I love the way the author brings protagonist Shana Merchant's past into her present situation.

I always enjoy books that layer in family history and events from a character’s background to show how they were formed by their experiences. I also love a solid police procedural that shows off a talented detective doing what she does best.

The rural environment made the story even tenser for me as Detective Merchant finds herself back in her small hometown. I am a big fan of this series.

By Tessa Wegert ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Dead Season as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Senior Investigator Shana Merchant has spent years running from her past. But she never imagined a murder case would drive her to the most dangerous place of all—home. 

After leaving the NYPD following her abduction by serial killer Blake Bram, Shana Merchant hoped for a fresh start in the Thousand Islands of Upstate New York. Her former tormentor has other plans. Shana and Bram share more than just a hometown, and he won’t let her forget it. When the decades-old skeleton of Shana's estranged uncle is uncovered, Bram issues a challenge: Return home to Vermont and solve the cold case,…


Book cover of The Darlings

Jillian Medoff Author Of When We Were Bright and Beautiful

From my list on very rich families with very dark secrets.

Why am I passionate about this?

According to Entertainment Weekly, I’m a “bestselling author who has made a name for [myself] with uncannily insightful takes on the dark side of family institutions.” But really, I’m just a novelist who has always been fascinated by the myriad ways we play out our unresolved issues from childhood, again and again, over the course of our lives. Although my books are very different from each other, they all focus on the interrelationships among family members (traditional families, work families, etc.). In my most recent novel, When We Were Bright and Beautiful, I look at how wealth, privilege, and power can corrupt even the most loving relationships.

Jillian's book list on very rich families with very dark secrets

Jillian Medoff Why Jillian loves this book

From the first scene of The Darlings, Christina Alger plunges you into the lives of the fabulously wealthy. The daughter of a Wall Street financier, Alger grew up in this world, and her experience and insight make the book sing. The Darlings is fast-paced and compulsively readable, and the characters are well-drawn and authentic. This novel includes everything I love: financial crimes, shocking scandals, lots of details, and terrific storytelling. 

By Cristina Alger ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Darlings as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

'Cristina Alger's debut novel offers a fresh and modern glimpse into New York's high society. I was hooked from page one' Lauren Weisberger, author of The Devil Wears Prada

From the author of The Banker's Wife and Girls Like Us comes an explosive drama about family, greed and high society scandal.

The Darlings of New York are untouchable. But no one is safe from a scandal this big.

When Carter Darling's business partner commits suicide, it triggers a huge financial investigation.

The allegations are serious. The danger of it exposing their private lives is equally threatening.

In times of crisis,…


Book cover of The Other Family

V.P. Morris Author Of ShadowCast

From my list on thrillers with morally gray female protagonists.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’ve always been fascinated by people’s motives whether that be in real life or written on the page. That’s what drew me to write in the thriller genre to begin with because at the core, it's about finding out why people do things. But sometimes this genre portrays female characters as either innocent damsels or evil femme fatales, neither of which captures that women are a mix of good and bad like all other people. That’s why I try to write my female protagonists in my novels, short stories, and fictional podcasts, in a way that makes them conflicted humans and causes them to experience both downfalls and triumphs. 

V.P.'s book list on thrillers with morally gray female protagonists

V.P. Morris Why V.P. loves this book

This novel is exactly what I look for in a thriller.

It’s fast-paced, filled with twists, and full of complex female characters.

The Howell Family is forced to move from California to Brooklyn for the husband’s job. Wife and mother, Nora is tasked with setting up their new home and getting her two teen daughters settled into their new schools.

However, she discovers their new Brownstone was the site of a grisly murder of an entire family in the 1990s. Soon one of the daughters notices someone stalking her and their house causing the family to fear the killer has returned.

But Nora isn’t the helpless stay-at-home mother everyone thinks she is as she goes through great lengths including hiding a dark past to keep her family safe. 

By Wendy Corsi Staub ,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Other Family as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

One of PopSugar's Most Anticipated Books!

One of Bibliofile's Most Anticipated Mystery/Thriller Books!

“Great psychological suspense with a wallop of a twist.” —Harlan Coben, #1 New York Times bestselling author

New York Times bestselling author Wendy Corsi Staub makes her trade paperback debut with a fast-paced thriller in the vein of Lisa Jewell’s The Family Upstairs and Megan Collins’ The Winter Sister. Here, a family making a fresh start moves into a house which was the site of an unsolved triple homicide—and are watched by an unknown person...

The watcher sees who you are...and knows what you did. 

It’s the…


Book cover of Nightbitch
Book cover of The Whispers
Book cover of The Mother Act

Share your top 3 reads of 2025!

And get a beautiful page showing off your 3 favorite reads.

1,340

readers submitted
so far, will you?

5 book lists we think you will like!

Interested in family secrets, French travel, and murder?

Family Secrets 222 books
French Travel 42 books
Murder 1,127 books