Books like Being Essential — picked by fans

This book helped me release shame after a colleague of mine told me my work wasn’t “science.”

Here’s the truth: to create a healing platform, I needed to tap into ways of thinking that academia sees as “woo woo” and “savage.” I looked to the stars. I meditated. I did rituals and read myths.

Dr. Kimmerer, trained as a traditional botanist, realized that the Indigenous myths and stories she was told as a child contained scientific knowledge passed down for generations by her tribe.

She realized there were scientific truths her community knew for millennia that traditional scientists only discovered within the last 100 years. This is the power of Ancestral Intelligence, disregarded by the same science that ultimately created AI.

What stories, fables, and myths have taught you valuable lessons about the world?

This is another counter-intuitive recommendation, but I find I learn a lot about leading by getting outside the confines of leadership books.

Heller is a pioneer in social design, solving complex challenges by working with communities rather than doing something to them. The emphasis on listening and iterating solutions are directly applicable to leading through crisis and change. The process she outlines is approachable and her stories compelling. My copy has lots of highlighting.

For me, Heller’s approach takes away the pressure of trying to have all the answers by reminding me that when you ask the right questions and involve the right people, the answers will emerge. 

My work on crisis leadership uses applied neuroscience to help people get “smarter their brains” by learning to work with and, in some cases counteracting, their instinctual reactions and ingrained patterns.

Jensen, who has worked with elite athletes as well as executives, draws on some of the same science (and more) in a practical approach to how to handle pressure. He goes through how to use breathing to tame anxiety and increase focus.

One insight I’ve found particularly useful is remembering what’s not at stake in a high-stakes situation. No matter what happens, your family, friends, and pets will still love and support you, for example. Knowing what you can count on makes a seemingly overwhelming challenge more manageable.

Ah, there is nothing more quintessentially freelance than riding the highs and lows.

Some months, clients are stampeding to work with you and other months you pitch your projects to a resounding chorus of crickets. This book about thriving in uncertainty helped me ground myself in moments of transition (a.k.a. always).

It also helped me understand that the more unique my career was, the better, because it helps me differentiate myself from the pack. Plus the book reads like a warm hug, and that’s exactly what you want when, well, everything is in flux. 

Why do women feel like we need to invite everyone to every party, throw weddings that are closer to our parents’ style than our own, and show up to networking nights that we know we won’t get anything out of?

I know this book is meant to be about hosting gatherings, but I’ve applied the principles to nearly everything I do in work and hobbies to add more intention, impact, and fulfillment. I’ve changed the way I sit at restaurants to encourage deeper conversations with friends. I’ve started to purposefully not invite certain people to certain parties since I know it would change the dynamic negatively for others. I’ve embraced the idea of “pop-up rules” at every event I host and expect guests to follow them so that the event is transformative and not boring.

Since reading Priya’s incredible framework, I’ve led extremely successful monthly events for my community, started… show more.

This book gave me the confidence to follow a dream that I thought was frivolous and silly: to be a professional speaker. As I read this book, I realized that following my heart was difficult for me, as I am a veterinarian and driven by science. As a result, I lost touch with my intuition and my confidence in doing what was true to myself, not what others expected of me.

When I read the part where she talks about thinking that your dream couldn’t be that because it seems too big and following that little voice that says, “What if?” It put me on the path of taking a chance on a dream, regardless of what it looked like to other people. 

This is a small “L” leadership book, and I love its ideas and its examples. When I read it for the first time, it gave me a new perspective on the very personal nature of leadership. The book was jammed (it still is!) with great insights about the connection between what is inside of me and how I could lift and strengthen other people when I lead.

All I have to do when I once again take a look at this book is to read the table of contents–purpose-centered, internally-directed, other-focused, externally open, positive force–and I am reminded that this is a book that helps me stay focused on helping people and organizations thrive. It is a great lift!

I love this book because it gave me the structure to start writing.

The practice of Morning Pages opened a door and allowed me to express myself without judgment. I enjoyed Cameron’s prompts and have gone through them multiple times over the years, which has allowed me to track how I am evolving. 

Cameron shows us that creativity is a spiritual and healing act that all of us should pursue in order to feel truly human.

I love frameworks. Especially ones that make simple and clarifying distinctions about our complex inner life. That’s exactly what Chamine has done with this book. When I read this book in 2012 and completed the accompanying free online assessment to identify my saboteurs, I was greatly humbled by the sobering accuracy of how I self-sabotage.

While reading the book, I was engrossed in the combination of logic, science, and stories helping to illuminate how and why we all have a unique mix of these universal saboteurs: Controller, Stickler, Hyper-Achiever, Restless, Hyper-Rational, Victim, Avoider, Pleaser, Hyper-Vigilant. I learned how to identify when I was coming from a place of self-sabotage and what to do to overcome unhelpful habits, (i.e., strengthen my PQ muscles).

It was fun, engaging, and motivating to read, and the practical tips made this book incredibly useful. I use his framework in conjunction with my own to make… show more.

On September 12, 1984 I relocated from South Florida to Los Angeles where I had just one friend who was preparing to move to NYC in 10 days. With a very small budget and no job, I was terrified about how things would turn out. 

Fortunately, on the long plane ride I read Creative Visualization in which I discovered the secrets to manifesting! Thanks to the lessons in this book, within two weeks I launched myself into a new home, a new career, and found a new best friend. This book is truly responsible for helping make my dream life come true.