I have long been drawn to understanding others and finding ways to improve the human condition. My introduction to autism as a teenager opened my eyes to the power of truly listening—beyond words—to understand others. The books I am recommending taught me to balance empathy with critical thinking, to be compassionate yet skeptical, and to remain deliberate in how I approach human behavior. Each one has influenced not only my work as a behavior scientist but also how I connect with people in everyday life. I share them in the hopes they will inspire the same insight and care in you.
When I was in graduate school, I watched the movie Awakenings with Robin Williams playing the role of Dr. Oliver Sacks. Having really enjoyed the movie, I went to a bookstore and picked this book up and could not put it down.
Sacks, more than any author I have read, captures the perspectives, struggles, triumphs, feelings, and diversity of people dealing with various psychological and neurological conditions.
At the time, studying psychology, I was reading books, listening to lectures, and watching videos about effective listening practices. Sacks made me understand seeing the person—observing and identifying subtleties, idiosyncrasies, and proclivities—was part of being an effective observer and that listening was only possible if we use our eyes as well.
If a man has lost a leg or an eye, he knows he has lost a leg or an eye; but if he has lost a self - himself - he cannot know it, because he is no longer there to know it.
In this extraordinary book, Dr. Oliver Sacks recounts the stories of patients struggling to adapt to often bizarre worlds of neurological disorder. Here are people who can no longer recognize everyday objects or those they love; who are stricken with violent tics or shout involuntary obscenities, and yet are gifted with unusually acute artistic or mathematical talents.…
Those of us who do behavior science are data-driven. In the realm of human services, it is hard to describe to people what you do and why this approach resonates with those of us in the field.
Just as I was coming into behavior science, I picked up this book, one of the few available dealing with autism. It was eye-opening: a mother’s honest, heart-wrenching, determined look as she came to understand behavior science as a gift of compassion, hope, and promise for those with autism and their families.
I remember thinking that this book was validating the career path I was going down, feeling optimistic about where it would take me, and being grateful to learn about the importance of listening to people talk about their struggles.
She was a beautiful doelike child, with an intense, graceful fragility. In her first year, she picked up words, smiled and laughed, and learned to walk. But then Anne-Marie began to turn inward. And when her little girl lost some of the words she had acquired, cried inconsolably, and showed no interest in anyone around her, Catherine Maurice took her to doctors who gave her a devastating diagnosis: autism. In their desperate struggle to save their daughter, the Maurices plunged into a medical nightmare of false hopes, "miracle cures," and infuriating suggestions that Anne-Marie's autism was somehow their fault. Finally,…
Gifts from a Challenging Childhood
by
Jan Bergstrom,
Learn to understand and work with your childhood wounds. Do you feel like old wounds or trauma from your childhood keep showing up today? Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed with what to do about it and where to start? If so, this book will help you travel down a path…
In the mid-90s, competing and sometimes absurd psychological ideas were everywhere, part of both popular culture and psychology. I was young and in search of answers in a sprawling sea of facts muddled with misinformation. The Myth of Repressed Memory was revelatory for me.
The authors detailed the fashionable but fictitious ideas about repressed memory and the horrifying results of unproven theories guiding therapies. They methodically and authoritatively asserted and separated facts from fiction. It showed me what could happen if therapists were guided and swayed by fantastical but fabricated theories.
It made me more certain I wanted to help; more sure that the better answers were found in science; and more determined that listening can and should be guided by critical thinking.
According to many clinical psychologists, when the mind is forced to endure a horrifying experience, it has the ability to bury the entire memory of it so deeply within the unconscious that it can only be recalled in the form of a flashback triggered by a sight, a smell, or a sound. Indeed, therapists and lawyers have created an industry based on treating and litigating the cases of people who suddenly claim to have "recovered" memories of everything from child abuse to murder.
This book reveals that despite decades of research, there is absolutely no controlled scientific support for the…
When I read this book, I knew who I was: a behavior scientist.
Knowing this, of course, didn’t bring me fame or fortune, nor did it solve any personal problems. Reading this book, though, was powerful and lasting.
It helped determine the idea I would pursue a life trying to help improve the human condition using behavior science, something I have done now for over 30 years. It made me realize behavior science is inherently empathic, pragmatic, and optimistic.
I didn’t read it understanding all of the references or all the ideas that I would come to study later, but I understood the listening I would do would provide an understanding of a person’s environment and how, maybe, just maybe, small changes in it could make the person’s world better, one behavior at a time.
A seminal work that delves into the depths of one of psychology's most influential and controversial philosophies.
Written by a leading proponent of behaviorism, this comprehensive book offers an exploration of the principles and arguments that underpin this groundbreaking approach to understanding human behavior.
"About Behaviorism is an opportunity to match wits with one of the great men of psychology and to participate in some of its great debates." —James B. Rule, Newsday
Gifts from a Challenging Childhood
by
Jan Bergstrom,
Learn to understand and work with your childhood wounds. Do you feel like old wounds or trauma from your childhood keep showing up today? Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed with what to do about it and where to start? If so, this book will help you travel down a path…
As a 19-year-old kid thinking about maybe being a psychologist, I picked this book up after hearing about the idea of unconditional positive regard introduced by Carl Rogers.
This book contained transcriptions from many of the debates Rogers had with prominent psychologists in the 1950s. When I was reading it, much of it escaped me. But then, he had a dialogue with a psychologist that riveted me. When I read the psychologist’s words, I thought, “This is how I think,” and “Yes, this is the way I see things.”
The psychologist was the eminent behaviorist B. F. Skinner, and this book served to strengthen the idea of listening to others without judgment and also began my lifelong curiosity with more science-based approaches to helping others.
The Lives of the Silent is a book about relationships. Through 15 moving stories of people with autism and other developmental disabilities, the silent reveal their resilience, humor, and humanity. Their actions, often more powerful than words, invite us to see them as whole people and to listen with compassion.
Though they could not write their own stories, these individuals became the author’s greatest teachers, reshaping his understanding of human behavior, dignity, connection, and what it means to truly care. These stories honor these individuals’ impact on their worlds and remind us that sometimes the deepest bonds are felt, not spoken.
